Introducing Me

Some of you are probably wondering why I named this post after a Nick Jonas song, some of you probably weren’t wondering that at all but are now questioning my taste in music, most of you however probably stopped reading a few sentences ago. Good, lesser people to inflict mental damage upon, so to the survivors, I suggest you brace yourself for an onslaught of petty, obnoxious teenage-y writing.

Also yes, the title doesn’t lie, this is pretty much a post introducing…me, not my mom, not my goldfish, but me. Side note-any complaints regarding the content of this post can be sent to @awindlessmidnight, who is mentally holding me at gunpoint to write an ‘about me’ post.

  • In case my writing wasn’t ‘feminine’ enough, I’m a girl, I’ll turn 16 this April (further details shan’t be disclosed, in case of kidnappers or worse hackers on the loose)
  • I take full advantage of my literacy, by which I meant to say-I read, quite a lot.For those poor unfortunate souls who don’t understand the origin of my username-it’s a tribute to harry potter *mental mini obsession session*
  • I have a squad of really close friends, we prowl through the night, vandalizing and littering and doing other no-good-stuff. I kid, that requires movement.
  • I secretly adore my sister (accuse me of this in real life and you shall receive a glare so intense it will make you wish you were never born) and not-so-secretly adore my parents.
  • I have the misfortune of knowing people who use excessive multitudes of exclamatory marks and say-lol,k and other such atrocities.
  • I cannot whistle, an inability which gives me much woe.
  • It wouldn’t be unwise to bet that my hearing will fail by my thirties, I listen to too many songs, way too loudly.
  • My thoughts could switch from- “What is the purpose of my life? Does my existence really matter?” to “Is the plural of octopus,octopuses or octopi?” in merely seconds. I consider it an art form.
  • All I want is a dog, called Benzene. Don’t reach for the phone, no need to call child services, I vow to never name my kids horrible names like Yoga or North.

AVE ATQUE VALE

 

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