The alarm did not beep because I don’t like starting the day filled with homicidal tendencies directed towards the inventor of alarm clocks. It was a (sorta) beautiful day to open my newly born blog whose password I temporarily forgot but then remembered that it was the same as my email’s passwo- wait, why am I revealing important confidential information. Dear hacker, kindly delete this information from your brain. Ok I’m clearly bad at story telling.*initiating back-up plan*

newly-hatched-blogger strolling across wordpress.

newly-hatched-blogger sees two followers.

newly-hatched-blogger faints.

Yeah you have read right. I have two HUMAN followers. I stress human because I may or may not have briefly considered them being cyborgs who follow innocent victims and then BOOM.kill.my.precious.laptop.

BUUUUUT they are not cyborgs. I think.

Well unfortunately I don’t have protocols to follow when such events occur. Do I virtually send them thank-you-for-not-being-a-cyborg cards? I feel like I should.

ANYWAY if you are reading what you are reading dear follower you.are.awesome.

P.S I will not blame you if you decide to flee to a faraway country and change your name to stay-away-demented-women. You have my blessings.


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